what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
