Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Randomize
