I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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