My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
