They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
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