it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
