Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
