you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
