Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
