That's when you crack a 10am beer
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
