Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
