hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
