I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
