someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
