respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I could fuck to npr.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
