One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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