Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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