.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
