That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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