she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
