Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
