You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Ketchup is God's man juice
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
