But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
