No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
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