think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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