will power is for people who don't want to get laid
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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