Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
