Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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