Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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