I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Randomize
