But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
