Those balls look pretty dangerous.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
