HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
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