I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
