How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
