Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
