I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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