I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
