Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Randomize