I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
