we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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