im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
