I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize