Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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