This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
