All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Everclear isn't food dammit
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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