White coat. Heels.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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