I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
