After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
