everyone is single if you try hard enough
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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