quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
